How to date online: 9 Simple steps to success

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being duccessful in online datingOne of the biggest complaints that people have about online dating is that it’s hard to meet someone and it ends up being a waste of time. They feel this way because they don’t know how to successfully grab people’s attention and they struggle with find the right way to move things along from the first message to a first date. This is why you have to take time to fill out your profile and be thoughtful about the things you say to potential matches. If you know how to make a good impression and make all the right moves then you’ll be meeting women in no time.

1) Join established online dating sites

There are thousands of online dating sites you can join so you need to carefully select one or two that you’re going to use. You don’t want to join a site that only has a few members or a site that has a membership fee because you don’t know if you’ll like it. You need to join online dating sites that are established and have thousands of active members. There’s many good free sites and reputable paid sites usually offer a free trial period you can use to check it out. You want to join a site that is well known, active, has a good reputation and is going to protect your privacy.

2) Fill out all of your profile

When you join a site you get a blank profile to fill out and usually there’s some quizzes you can take to help you find good matches. You should fill out as much of the profile as you can so people who look at it can get a good idea of who you are and if you’re the kind of guy, they’re looking for. Taking the quizzes will increase your chances of finding someone who’s right for you so take some time to do it and see who it matches you with.

3) Keep messages short and friendly

When you’re meeting women you want your message to be short and friendly so that you make them feel good about replying to you. If your message is only a couple of words or uses slang like ‘sweetie’ or ‘babe’ then she’s going to think you’re rude and delete it and if your message is too long she won’t bother reading it all. Your message should be four or five sentences long so you can introduce yourself and let her get to know you a bit. She’s going to appreciate the nice message and reply back because it stands out from the other messages she gets.

4) Use the search function

It can be fun when you first start online dating to check out profiles at random but you’re going to have more success by using the search function. This lets you be selective about which profiles you see and you can narrow you search down by different attributes like age, location, fetishes or type of relationship they’re looking for. Most of the profiles that come up are going to be a better match for you instead of random profiles which stops you from wasting time and help you with meeting women sooner.

5) Reply to messages at the right pace

Even though you’re not talking face to face it’s still scary replying to messages because you don’t want to say the wrong thing and this can lead to you waiting so you can think of the perfect reply. Waiting too long though will make her think you’re not interested in her and she’s going to start looking for someone else but if you reply too quickly she’s going to think you’re desperate and spending all day on online dating sites. You need to time your messages for a good pace, never sooner than an hour after receiving it and no longer than a day or two.

6) Upload current and appropriate pictures

It’s common for people on online dating sites to upload old pictures because they’re self-conscious about their age or how they currently look while others post a ton of naked or nearly naked pictures. When you’re meeting women you don’t want to have either of these pictures on your profile because it comes across as being untrustworthy and desperate for sex. Choose pictures that were taken recently and make sure you’re fully dressed because this makes you seem mature and confident which is what women are looking for when they’re online dating.

7) Show enthusiasm and confidence

It’s easy to let your nervousness show through messages because you’ll do things like jokingly put yourself down or write short sentences because you want her to take the lead so you can avoid the risk of saying the wrong thing. If you want to be successful at online dating you need to show enthusiasm and confidence because those are attractive qualities. Always sound assured in your messages and never put yourself down while still being polite and friendly. After messaging for a while tell her that you’d love to go on a first date with her and have fun together by coming up with the perfect evening.

8) Don’t be too sexual

being too sexual
People who are online dating know that sex is to be expected but men and women see it differently so you need to think about things from her perspective. Men are more upfront about what they want but when you’re meeting women you need to take things slow so she has time to get to know you and feel comfortable taking things to a sexual level with you. You should flirt with her and pay attention to how she reacts so you can go at her pace. When it’s clear she wants to exchange sex pictures or messages then you can take the lead.

9) Arrange a first date quickly

One problem with online dating is that messages either go nowhere and people lose interest after a couple of them or they go on for ages because they don’t know how to take things further. You need to arrange a first date quickly so she knows you’re serious and she doesn’t have time to message any other guys. As soon as it’s clear she’s attracted to you, you need to ask if she’s ready to meet. When she says that she is you can suggest a couple of days when you’re free and let her pick a time and place.

Dating Writer at
She lives in Malibu (California).
Currently She works as dating writer for different adult blogs, and She coaches men and women on sex and relationship.
Katy Benett

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